For some brides-to-be families, these requirements from the bridegroom are not simply about money but about the future status of their daughters in a new family.
"I am not an unreasonable person, but I still insist my daughter follow the mainstream for her betrothal gifts and apartment," says Wan Mengqi, who has a 25-year-old daughter. "If a man cannot prove that he is able to meet the average financial standard of society, then how could he guarantee a secure marriage for my daughter? Money isn't everything, but no money is nothing.
"The ripe age of young girl is so short and I believe the gifts show sincerity and respect of the bridegroom's family. I'm not asking for a big villa or a sum the groom's family cannot afford. Let's say its amount should hurt, but not wound," she laughs.
Mother-in-law-to-be Wan says the family of the bride also pays a considerable amount, what used to be called a dowry or jia zhuang (嫁妆).
"Usually the bride-to-be families in Shanghai are not the ones who don't know the rules," says Pan Yicheng, a 55-year-old primary school teacher with a 26-year-old daughter.
"We don't want to seem stingy and snobbish to the bridegroom's parents. We have a tacit understanding that we will pay for the complete renovation, outfitting and furnishing of the apartment, buy all the appliances and a car," she says.
She says that when the bride's family pitches in and shares some of the costs, the relations between the two families will be better in the future.
Controversial audition of 'blind date with rich'
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