(Life Times) |
At the end of last year, "Baidu Zhidao" reviewed 20 million questions related to "fear", analyzed Chinese people's fears, and published a list of "What Chinese people are afraid of". This list may not be precise, but to some extent it does reflect social anxieties. One interesting and thought-provoking conclusion from the list is that men and women have totally different fears.
Top 10 fears
Men are afraid of poverty; women dread growing old
According to statistics, 2.9 million questions show that men are afraid of poverty while more than 2.7 million questions reveal women's fears of growing old. The difference between male and female attitudes is highlighted by the fact that the top fear of each group does not appear in the "top 10 fears" of the other group - men are less concerned with age and appearance, while women don't consider financial issues as important.
The definition of 'success' in modern society suggests that men should be rich and women should be good-looking.
Material wealth is not the only measure of success and aging is the not the end of charm. If we see things in a different light, we'll find out that making less money or even losing fortunes are just temporary setbacks. Life is not easy; if we treat adversities as treasures, work hard and aim high, then we will be successful one day. Women might as well regard aging as the sign of maturity.
Fears about marriage
Men are afraid of getting trapped; women seek advice on keeping husbands
For thousands of years, a state of tension has existed between the aspirations of men and women. Women seek stability through marriage, and focus on their family lives; men, on the other hand, have an emotional tendency to "look around". Men, their attention diverted to life outside the family, may overspend their incomes and cause family financial difficulties. Women, on the other hand, are sensitive; they demand a high-quality relationship. If their husbands show little interest in them, they will feel it very deeply.
Social morality has a deterrent effect on men's tendency to "look around"; women should practice "passive governance" and comfort their husbands with small things in order to maintain a stable marriage. Psychologists thinks that fears are self-fulfilling prophecies - if we are always suspicious, then the thing we fear is bound to happen.
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